January 1, 2009

three hundred sixty-five new opportunities and almost just as many resolutions to make, here's to living each day to the fullest.

January 2, 2009

guns reduce the population, sperm increases it, hence sperm trumps guns.
pretty sure that my hometown invasion tour hangover has lasted this long, and hoping that it's over.
just because i don't have a problem with it doesn't mean it's not annoying, it just means that the value at the other side is completely worth the time.

January 3, 2009

saltine brittle.

January 4, 2009

if i am notorious for anything, there is probably nothing i am more notorious for than sleeping in cars.

January 5, 2009

the lovers want minis, minis that are adopted from the hood in compton.
yes, i often refer to myself as 'we', because i have a team of little monsters who work for my endlessly, but they are invisible and can't be seen.
surely people would change the way they play monopoly if they just knew which properties were landed on most frequently, there are powers in numbers and advertisers should be finding out which properties are landed on most frequently.

January 6, 2009

let it simmer.
what the wtf.
scaffolding is fascinating.
well i'm at that intersection right now, and u-turns are illegal.

January 7, 2009

a whatevership.
don't be all scrunch face.
my neurons just aren't firing in sync today.

January 8, 2009

be me.
slow down my friend, just sloooowwww down.

January 9, 2009

a zamboni just drove by outside.

January 10, 2009

investigating hunches.
seeking simple things with good people.

January 11, 2009

that was very uncharacteristic.
there's no such thing as enough snow, it's an oxymoron.
a squiger would be the best animal ever, half squirrel, half tiger.

January 12, 2009

poke-a-thon.
i got the benies.

January 13, 2009

spiral bound notebooks without perforated pages should have been banished about twenty-six years ago.

January 14, 2009

rockability.
that's like a round of making out with nap included.

January 15, 2009

i don't believe in too cold for ice cream.

January 16, 2009

you know, it would be really nice if i had someone to make brownies and cookies for on a weekly basis, and no i don't mean a roommate.

January 17, 2009

no, it's not bugsy siegel, it's bugsy the seagull.

January 18, 2009

mmmmmz i gotz browniez in my mouth.

January 19, 2009

there is no question that i found some motivation lately, welcome round two, now the problem is to find motivation in things that make money, but fruit is better for you than money.

January 20, 2009

speechless with the perfect mixture of inspiration and hope.

January 21, 2009

when making a sandwich one should always align the slices of bread correctly so they remain symmetrical, this is a essential practice in perfect sandwich making.

January 22, 2009

you've got some chocolate on your sleeve.
i want to create recursive acronyms all day long.
leaving extra time on the microwave should be considered an act punishable by banishment.
if only i didn't have to pace while talking on the phone, it's just that if i don't pace my thoughts run into a road block.

January 23, 2009

spending twenty-five cents at the glumball machine.

January 24, 2009

i'm not always the nicest boy in the sandbox, but i build the biggest sand castle.
maybe i'll send her a high school senior photo just to let her know i'm interested.

January 25, 2009

gettin' my jelly belly on.
these socks create an enormous amount of static electricity, i get shocked nearly every time i move.
holy cow, this is the finest spoon i've ever used, the width, the concaveness, the strength, it just fits my mouth to perfection, i must find a secret place to keep it.

January 26, 2009

that's a problem in life right now, i know so many incredible people but they are spread out like pollen in the springtime.
i never feel bad for eating too much ice cream, that's one of the most ridiculous thoughts i've ever heard, the more i eat the better i feel.

January 27, 2009

trends should be cared for more delicately than one time occurrences.
simply, my greatest concern is to keep progression alive in relationships, believing that no matter what stage it's at or the adversities it faces, that it can always prosper.

January 28, 2009

teeth marks all over my tongue, ouch.
picked the bucket up fast, and dumped it out even faster.

January 29, 2009

ohh it's like an orange orgasm.
my ego is on lunch break while i'm stuck here eating wafers, and i don't mean nilla wafers either.

January 30, 2009

frosted mini-wheats taste so good that it doesn't matter that they feel like you're eating tiny splinters of wood.
when there is no confidence in the confidence being restored, i don't believe it will be restored, but when there is confidence at least there is a chance at restoring confidence.

January 31, 2009

copiers are the root of all evil, not money.
mmm speaking of nutrition, i want some bacon.
it'll be three years in may, i'm not sure how i feel about that.
cologne? axe body spray? screw that, just hand me the febreze.
if you're reading this, just to let you know, it doesn't take much to make me feel guilty.