February 1, 2009
chest rubs are even more effective than mint chip ice cream.
my casualness vs. their professionalism, i feel that's often a disconnect.
why are twist ties used for loafs of bread and those tiny plastic things used for hamburger and hot dog buns?
February 2, 2009
can't dodge the radio.
February 3, 2009
z is the new s.
perhaps the only thing better than bread is toast.
February 4, 2009
one year, two notches.
i have a cookie problem.
sprinkling some magic beard-be-gone powder over selective parts of my face so that a handlebar mustache remains.
February 5, 2009
beef face.
February 6, 2009
disorganized hair.
become the deposit machine you've always dreamed of.
February 7, 2009
fried and bendered.
February 8, 2009
i want you.
February 9, 2009
no, lamprey.
my trunk is pretty big.
February 10, 2009
the hair gods did not intend for me to have straight hair.
February 11, 2009
brick walls exist for a reason.
it's not the complete solution for a sad heart, but mint chip ice cream will have to do for now.
alright, so my burrito making skills are pretty lackluster, but that doesn't mean i can't scarf one down.
i think that we're probably the same kinds of weird, which means we just come across as normal to each other.
the good thing about my aching little heart is that for some reason it makes me feel like the quintessential bugsy again.
February 12, 2009
our bellies may be bigger, but we do have more wisdom.
regrettably, the amount i read is rather minimal, however i feel that the amount of knowledge and value i gain from reading is far above average.
February 13, 2009
i have ideas and they are dangerous.
February 14, 2009
i get upset when people say their tummy hurts after eating chocolate cake and strawberry ice cream, clearly it's because they simply did not eat enough of it.
February 15, 2009
is robust.
February 16, 2009
tats, tots, and tits.
February 17, 2009
pudcation.
balls and all.
we are old men my friend, i've got custom matching canes on order, thanks for the matching fur coats.
February 18, 2009
broken eyes, broken fingers, broken hearts.
if i was in a fishing competition for girls i would use godiva chocolate for bait.
February 19, 2009
aholic.
February 20, 2009
your genius is showing.
February 21, 2009
legit, since 1983.
get up in my nook.
i haven't come to too many conclusions in life, but one definite conclusion is that variety truly is the spice of life, and absolutely nothing about variety is overrated.
February 22, 2009
relentless and tenacious.
February 23, 2009
i will always fizzle out.
floating rocks or floating rocks.
February 24, 2009
looking to maximize the frosting to wheat ratio.
February 25, 2009
put in sun, add water, wait.
you seem like good people, and by chance i just happen to like good people.
hopefully some miracle blesses my life like a squirrel who can give a piggyback ride to an elephant.
February 26, 2009
none, i am a chick flick.
how pancakes saved the world.
February 27, 2009
holy eskimo!
at the heart of things i believe i have always been most concerned with creation.
February 28, 2009
red on blue on red.
